Hi everyone!
It’s me, Crazy Motherfucking James!
This game has been an incredibly wild ride for ALL of us from start to finish. With all the twists, people quitting or otherwise leaving the game without an eviction, cheating scandals (Amanda! jk), and confrontations, it really was such a whirlwind and I’m sure a year from now I’ll still be mentally unpacking everything that happened. Just know I had an absolute blast and that there is literally nobody here I wouldn’t love to call, message or whatever after the game. I know everyone has their own unique story and perspective about how the game played out, why things went the way they did, and who is the most awesome/who completely sucks. And a big part of the fun after this will be hearing all those stories and learning how much (or little) I really knew.
My goal in this opening statement is not to convince anyone their individual story or perspective is wrong, or that I was a mastermind, or that I controlled the season and played a flawless game. That’s not the truth (and even if it was, you wouldn’t believe me, lol). What I CAN do is shed a light on how I viewed the game, my strategies, philosophies, and actions, and how all of them combined to allow me to make it to the end. I will be going into way more detail below, but in my mind there were three key elements to my game: (1) recognition/reads, (2) flexibility, (3) boldness to make changes.
In other words, when a twist came, someone quit, someone new won a challenge or power, or a new alliance was forming, I was able to see how that would impact the game, be flexible in altering my strategies, and then have the willingness to act upon my new strategies. This may sound simple, but not everyone is willing to immediately shift their strategy to account for a change. Or perhaps someone doesn’t have the right read to see when the current path the game is taking is not advantageous to them. Whereas, when I saw the game taking a path I didn’t want at different junctures, I was WILLING to be the one to make big moves to make MY OWN CHANGES happen, to alter the most likely outcome. I wanted to put myself in a better position to get to the end and WIN (not just to make jury or be dragged to the end).
So I made reads, stayed flexible, and made bold moves to change the game. What does that mean for this vote? Why should you vote for me to win? Thanks for asking. I think these are the three KEY big brother attributes. I think if you are the best at these qualities, you are more likely to control your own destiny and make the end game more often (with a chance to win) than someone who plays passively or otherwise lacking these elements. People may point to phrases like “strategic” or “social” or “physical” games, but they all play into these elements. A good social game allows you to get information to get better reads. It allows you to remain flexible if you’ve built bonds with multiple people, so you can team up with them when circumstances require it. A good strategic game allows you to know when to pull the trigger on big moves, and to assess which moves are worth the risk or too risky. And regarding physical game, the simple truth is if you want to play a Big Brother game where you make big moves and make drastic changes to the ultimate outcome, one of the key ways to do that is by winning comps when you want to make that change. That is what I tried to do, gunning for HOH the first week when I could use it to establish alliances, then again on both double evictions where there was a chance to make a quick, decisive action to change the game. And if you don’t win comps and succeed in that element, ultimately you were at the mercy of others. And I wanted ownership of my game.
In general my guiding game principles were these:
-Stay flexible.
-Never say no to an alliance.
-Never completely trust an alliance.
-Avoid pissing off major challenge beasts. Use them as shields instead so my threat level looks lower in comparison.
-When someone is threatening my path to win, take them out as soon as I get the chance. There is always time to clean up messes later, especially if you stay flexible.
-Socially, I wanted to be funny and friendly. Doing things like the Circle Watch Party. I also tried to stay honest about my votes and my reasons for doing things. Even if I lied in the moment, I tried to be honest about why I felt the need to lie afterwards. All of this was to keep working relationships open with people to keep options open as the game progressed, so I could continue to gather information and jump between alliances when needed. I know some people may doubt my social game, but it allowed me to form my initial alliances, keep my alliance with Sezer, keep getting information from Jennie about things like the GroupChat alliance or other goings ons, build bonds with Chelsia and Adam and Jen that benefitted me as the game went on, and, even to stay as the lower perceived threat than Adam.
-Win comps when you need to make changes or survive, otherwise throw comps, especially veto.
-Never give up.
-Play to WIN.
The following description of my game is long and probably boring, but putting it all out there for you to see. I’ve organized it in terms of the moves I made that shaped the trajectory of the game, in my opinion.
Night 1
No wait, we need to go back before night one....
Before the Game (Winning Spy)
So, you all know I got the “stalker” zing from old Z-bot himself. Why is that? Well… after applying I became very obsessed with Isolated and Stranded. Like strangely so, lol. I listened to every podcast available on their youtube (sorry Glyn, I lied about the extent I listened). But I wasn’t just listening because I am weird. (I am weird but that wasn’t why I was listening).
I listened because I wanted to come into this game and play like a veteran. Obviously this was a great experience and I wanted to have fun too. But I knew that playing a game like this could be a once in a lifetime chance, and I didn’t want to have any regrets. The biggest thing I took away from the podcasts was a comment the hosts of the last season of stranded made at the end of their final podcast, that this would be a “unique lurking experience.” To me that screamed America’s Player or some variety of it (once in the game I learned that meant the weekly Spy), so I spent a ton of time on my pre-game DR, proposing wild strategies, adding lots of funny lolz, but most importantly asking the lurkers to pick me to be America’s player. And all that work paid off when I was made the first spy.
Night 1 (Using Spy to connect with Amanda, Glyn, and Jennie)
So, I guess you could say, who gives a shit. You became the first spy, big whoop...all you did was make Amanda safe. But I think my reign as spy is a good symbol of my game strategy for multiple reasons. One, just the fact that I was aware enough to try to take advantage of a potential spy/America’s player role. But more than that, I was able to leverage spy into creating my first alliance. When I first met Group A on night one, a few things were super apparent. First and foremost was that when I asked people who they felt good about, everyone said Amanda and Glyn. It was almost comical. And it became clear to me that they were astute at telling everyone what they wanted to hear (from night one Glyn loved to say stuff like “even though we haven’t spoken much yet I can already feel you and I are on the same page”). But at least I felt a good connection myself with Glyn night one, Amanda I didn’t feel good with. Our first conversation just didn’t have much flow or substance. But I viewed this as my first red flag about my own game and a chance to change its direction: if everyone else was feeling good with someone and I wasn’t, I viewed that as something that needed to change ASAP. So I decided to give Amanda immunity. In doing so I also pulled Glyn and Jennie into a room to tell them I was spy and to gain some trust. They too seemed on board with Amanda, especially Jennie. And I was able to form the bones of what became my initial core alliance: the Cardashians (Glyn, Amanda, Jennie, and myself). Although that alliance didn’t pan out into the endgame, it helped me make it to jury. And don’t worry, Amanda and Glyn already had like 50 alliances at this point I’m sure. But lets get back to me…
The Pre-Jury Phase (Building Closer Bonds with Adam, Sezer, and Jennie)
The other person I really connected with initially was Sezer. I know you all may have your issues with him, but we did bond and talked about his country of Chile and even spoke some Spanish together. He Glyn and I formed an alliance called Huasos, which is the term used for cowboys in Chile. [I actually looked up the word huasos myself after meeting Sezer, but then still suggested gauchos to Sezer, even knowing I was giving him the wrong term, so that Sezer could introduce me to the term huasos and would feel ownership over the alliance name. Sorry Sez!]
From there, other alliances started to form. And I parlayed my status as the first HOH to build those alliances. Amanda approached me to form the Light Bulb alliance with Sheila, Glyn, and myself. Adam proposed Mega7 (the Group A people minus Richard). And I even had another sort of alliance with Richard and Glyn, that never really took shape, largely because Richard never would speak game with me.
I grew concerned that Amanda had immediately formed a new final 4 immediately after Cardashians, which at the time I viewed as my “true” alliance. As the days went by it became clearer how close Glyn and Amanda were growing and that they had formed relationships with everyone. It seemed like they were also closer to Richard (especially Glyn) which worried me because he and I did not vibe strategically. Basically, I began to read and perceive that Glyn and Amanda were the true power duo. So I initiated my first change. I went to both Sezer and Jennie separately and formed final 2s with each of them. To each I gave the same message, be wary of Amanda, Glyn, and Richard, they are tighter than people realize, and we need to form our own duo to counterbalance them. Both seemed receptive, although I knew Jennie still had a likely final 2 with Amanda so I had to tread carefully. And I continued to water the seeds of doubt over time. Next, Adam and I formed our own final 2: Baby Wipes. Although this alliance was more social to start, it allowed me to lay the groundwork for us to work together later in the game. At that time, Adam was still clearly drinking the Amanda and Glyn kool aid, so with Adam I focused on our mutual target of Richard.
Chelsea Backdoor (My first attempt to use a shield)
By the time of the Chelsia backdoor plan it became clear to me it was time for me to make bigger changes. First, I began to read that Amanda wasn’t prioritizing me in her game. Amanda’s decision to do the backdoor was made without me, without consulting the Cardashians as a group, and also not consulting Light Bulb. She had made the decision somewhere else, with Glyn likely, and it became clear she did not value the final four deals we were in the same way I did. I also learned from Adam and Glyn that Amanda made a deal with Shahbaz to learn his power and that he would use it to help her.
So I initiated my next two big changes. (1) Using the context Adam and Glyn gave me, and my pregame research, I realized that Shahbaz’s power was the abduction power from last season. So I went to him and guessed the power, which shocked him, caused him to blow up at Amanda and in my mind neutralized some of the effectiveness of that relationship for Amanda. (2) As soon as Chelsia won POV, I knew she would be upset if she found out there was a plan to backdoor her and I hadn’t tipped her off (she and I had grown close). Jennie told me that Chelsia was blowing up at Amanda and seemed to know the plan, so I immediately went to Chelsia’s messages and, as she said “spilled everything.” I told her about Amanda and Glyn being a threat, and she told me that Glyn and especially Richard had worked their way in with Group B. I told her not to trust them, and I think I convinced her to put Amanda and Glyn up if she won. I don’t regret making a bold game-changing move like that, because she was a comp beast who could take out other big targets and be a shield for me. Unfortunately, the outcome I wanted didn’t happen, as she went home right away and blew me up on her way out (I’m guessing to protect Spiral who first told Chelsia the plan).
The Richard Move (Taking out my top threat and building my bond with Adam+Jen+Susie)
After Chelsia called me out I went into scramble mode with my allies, threw Spiral under the bus to my alliance immediately while simultaneously telling Spiral we had to protect each other so nobody found out. Ultimately I think it worked to avoid me being a top target. But my high risk/ high reward play with Chelsia seemed to, in my mind, just further cemented that Glyn and Amanda would always side with Richard over me. I ran through scenarios in my head, and every time I came to the same conclusion, unless I changed something I would never make the end game. I’d likely be cut 7th or 8th, like Sheila was. I did not want to play passively and wait to get put up against Amanda or Glyn and go out at final 7. I wanted to alter the course of the game. Like I said, I wanted to play like a vet, have no regrets, and play to win.
So I targeted Richard, the person I had the worst bond with in Group A and who was building connections with Group B, and who was tighter to my original allies than I was. This move allowed me to pivot to Adam (who had excluded Richard from Mega7) and Sheila (I hoped) who agreed with me that Richard was dangerous after he voted to keep Shahbaz. I even hoped it might cause Group B to reassess its strategy after losing Richard, and completely reset the game. I also think it helped me with Jen, and our connection grew after this move.
Putting up Glyn as a pawn was a risky move since I didn’t tell anyone about it in advance. But in my mind it was purely game and the best play to ensure my top target was voted out (since Glyn would be saved by the whole Mega7 at least). While I don’t regret the move, I do think I handled it not super well. I misjudged how much Jennie’s perception of me would change. I should have told her in advance.
I know people have said I’m socially inept or whatever. But honestly, the fact that I made that move and still NEVER received a vote and managed to not be nominated when Glyn won HOH, speaks to my social game. I put in huge amounts of hours and work to try to regain some trust with the Cardashians. It became clear they never would 100% trust me again, but I did at least rebuild enough of a working relationship with Glyn to stay off the block when he won. And in the process I had solidified Adam who at the time was a more dangerous player and stronger ally. The reason I stayed off the block on Susie’s HOH (prior to Glyn’s) was due to the alliance Adam and Jen pulled me into with Susie and Jennie, the five finger discount. Adam immediately exposed the alliance (which I think he now regrets, lol). But this is another example of where my social game with both Jen and Adam (two polar opposite personalities) basically saved me for a round. Susie and I also had a cordial and honest relationship, even if not too deep, so it kept the door open for when I had the chance to work with her in this alliance. Even my social game with Chelsia put me in a position to benefit from her challenge beast-dom, until she went out. And I was able to gather information from my social bond with Chelsia, which let me know how much of a threat Richard was.
My solidified relationship with Adam also gave me new information to work with and seeds of doubt to share with Jennie and Sezer. Glyn putting up Jen as a replacement that round also paved the way for Jen to grow closer with me and we ultimately formed a final 2. (Whether she prioritized our final 2 over any of her many other alliances, you will have to ask her haha.)
Taking Out Aisleyne (Saving Adam to keep my shield)
Unfortunately a series of events didn’t benefit my game. Sezer quitting was terrible for me, since he was the one person I fully trusted. And after Susie and Sheila went out, the house clearly wanted Adam out, and I could see the writing on the wall that I would be the next target as soon as Adam went out. I also knew that despite Aisleyne and my reconciliation, our trust was permanently damaged. So when I won HOH again at the double, I defied what the house wanted and saved Adam--taking my chance to change my fate by keeping my shield. From an outside perspective, I could see that taking out Ais could be seen as a “personal” move and not an actual big game move. But in my mind, at this point I wanted to LEAVE BIG TARGETS IN THE GAME. I felt that there was a chance that people other than Aisleyne could emerge as a big threat to win, and eventually Spiral did become that. I didn’t want to be the game’s last big target and have all eyes on me for 5 straight rounds. Ultimately, me winning challenges meant this strategy never even needed to play out.
Again, I admit I fucked up by not telling Jennie in advance. But in the end I don’t think it ended up seriously altering the outcome of things. I already didn’t have Amanda’s trust (oh yeah she made a final 2 with me a few days prior, likely her 4th or 5th such alliance, but didn’t give me any information. I even purposely gave her information she already knew to test her, like about the groupchat alliance and she never admitted to already knowing anything. She didn’t trust me at all. But I digress...). And Jennie/the house still targeted Adam over me when she won HOH.
But yes, luck again was not on my side when Adam failed to win the stacking HOH like he had won the similar counting one. So, I again saw the writing on the wall and adjusted. I threw Adam under the bus to save myself. I took advantage of the shield that I had saved for myself the round before. I had to do it, sorry man. I even encouraged Adam to make Jen a big target which I think he took a bit too far and dug himself a deeper hole. To try to reconcile things with Jennie, I even volunteered to be a pawn before she won HOH. Maybe that helped keep her target on Adam over me, idk. But I figured I was going up anyway. (And because I vowed to never stop trying, I had created a bunch of fake posts and powers to try to convince people to keep me over Jen if Adam won veto. I was going to try to say my power would switch three votes at random. The idea being people would vote to keep me thinking I was switching their votes. It probably wouldn’t have worked lol, but I’m just trying to say I always kept planning for every situation.
Endgame (Winning Comps Matters)
Once Adam was evicted, I had to kick it into overdrive. I tried all sorts of campaigning in case I didn’t win competitions. I pushed Jennie and Spiral as threats to Glyn. I pushed Glyn and Amanda as threats to Parker. I tried to tell everyone who would listen that Jen was actually a threat since she would take someone’s spot in final three (which was true). And I made the deal with Spiral at final 5 that I wouldn’t nominate him and he would keep me safe at final 4. If he ended up winning veto, that move would have paid off, even if I didn’t know 100% if he was telling the truth. But he lost veto and I took him out, since he was the only other person besides me that, in my view, had made multiple big moves altering the game’s trajectory. Ultimately I have no idea if these strategies would have worked. But I never needed them since I won veto or HOH every round the rest of the way. I get there could be hesitancy to vote based on comp wins, but my end of game comp wins weren’t luck. I won by significant margins. And in total I won 4 HOHs, 1 veto and the final competition. The most wins of anyone this season.
At the end, my decision to keep Parker was based on the fact he was already voted out and never won HOH or veto. He may blame Sezer for screwing up his vote, but the only reason Sezer even wanted to keep Parker was because I had convinced Sezer to vote that way (despite Glyn’s objections).
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So yeah, that’s how I got here. I know I’ve left some people out and plenty of details but this was fucking long enough. Quickly though I want to address some jurors individually.
Jennie: From night one I felt like we had a really strong personal bond. And everything I told you in the early stages of the game was true. Really everything other than my targets on the two double eviction nights was true. You know now where I stand on my mistakes and where I could have done better. I think in retrospect we see the game more similarly and I know you wish you might have been bolder when you had power, based on your answer for the final competition. I hope that means you at least understand why I made my moves, even if my execution was lacking. Happy to answer more questions.
Jen: I truly am happy I got to know you personally, even if you want from loving me one minute to asking me why I was betraying you the next. I wanted our alliance to work, but I knew you had so many alliances (with Ais, with Amanda/Glyn/Jennie) so I never knew if I was your true priority. I hope after the game you can look back positively on how you did, the connections you made, and this experience as a whole. Rufioooooo!
Sheila: I feel like you didn’t pop up much in my long intro, so sorry about that. I loved our banter and I do think we have a lot in common personally with our backgrounds and changing career paths. You were probably my favorite person in the game to just talk to and always made me laugh. Unfortunately I always felt you were closer to Amanda than me. And I didn’t feel like you had interest in really teaming up with me to make big risky moves. So our games just didn’t align in the second half as much.
Susie: We weren’t on the same side very often, but I’m glad we both stayed cordial and kept the door open. Because it allowed us to work together when the FFD alliance formed. I know we didn’t connect too much personally beyond me making incorrect irish references to you. But I’m excited to get to know the REAL you after this. And I’m grateful you didn’t put me on the block. Ultimately though, you were more dangerous than Jen, who I had built a stronger individual bond with.
Ais: I really enjoyed hanging out with you and talking about the Circle and please know me taking you out was not personal. It was game. I feel like if I didn't take you out then, you would have likely made a deep run in the game. But I wanted more "dangerous" targets in the game at that time.
Spiral: I said in one of my DRs that I wish I could have played the game like you. Keeping your profile low and winning comps is a great combination. Unfortunately, after I made that DR, your reputation as the biggest jury threat took over. Not sure what your standards will be for your vote, but no hard feelings if you vote in another direction.
Amanda: Sweet potatoes.
Adam: I loved working with you and your willingness to change the trajectory of the game too, even if you’re fucking nuts, lmao. It was great to scheme with you and if you had managed to win HOH the round Parker came back, this game would have been totally different. I respect your drive in this game immensely. I am super excited to meet you outside of this game and to sail off the edge of the world with you.
Lastly, I want to let you all know that I will be at a wedding Sunday night and on my phone during the live discussion. So if you have something you want to ask me and you want a thorough response, please try to ask in your thread in advance, if possible. I will do my best from my phone while drinking and dancing on Sunday night, but I can’t guarantee those posts will be very illuminating. Thanks to you all for your time!
I leave you all with my love note and apology-poem I sent to Aisleyne earlier in the game. I think they are fitting for all of us to keep in mind before the fireworks ahead. Talk to you soon:
Aisleyne, sorry I was mean
when you mix blue and yellow it makes green
Jen likes you and I like you too
let's all be friends and trains go "choo choo"
