This is my sixth confessional and you know I think the walls of text are secretly supported
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Either way let’s get right into it by starting off answering the questions.
Referring to question 1 I’m actually pretty pissed that Grace went home. She was a person I was hopeful I could work with from Group B. The fact that she was alone and she was pretty adamant about being isolated from everyone told me that I’d be able to easily slip in if need be. However, all my questioning about herself and her life went to complete waste because she just quit. I know technical difficulties you can’t control but if you’re gonna quit why are you gonna do it in the middle of a POV competition lmfao. You’re just wasting everyones time at this point. I will say that I think with Grace gone the game is starting to heat up a little as the “easy” nominations are all getting sent out. The last one left if Shah and at this point he may be more valuable as an extra vote. I won’t say it’s super heated up yet but we are working our way up there.
In regards to the spy I think that most people universally agree that either Grace or Shahbaz got it. They have been on the bottom and naturally audiences want to root for the underdog so if they didn’t get it I’d be shocked. In addition to that what their advantages are it hasn’t really been thought about. I said in my very first confessional that I think spies will become more prominent with time but right now when the cast is still so large with 17 people I don’t think it’s at the front of anyone’s mind.
Talking about the HOH I am ecstatic about how it went down. I honestly was convinced based off how I was performing in challenges prior to today that I would never win a comp. Even though I will openly admit our winning strategy did come from Sezer, I did suggest the minor part about communicating and sending each other a message so it’s easier. I will openly admit I was SHOCKED we won. When Sezer and I got paired because we were the last two I was like lmao let’s just get this over with theres no chance we will win. But I got really nervous the second we got into the challenge because I said to myself oh shit I have to carry my weight I can’t be the reason Sezer loses. I didn’t even want to win the challenge tonight so I didn’t know how to feel about it! So upon winning and being in shock that I actually won something, I knew I didn’t want to be the HOH. My current state of the game is dangerous. I’ve made a lot of promises and hand shakes to people and it’s far too early for me to go breaking them. I’ll break them when it’s right I’m not afraid to do it if the timing is correct. However, that timing is certainly not now lmfao. I don’t know what Sezer is gonna do but since he told me he’s gonna listen to my opinion the most, I’ve been trying really hard to persuade him and kinda push him to throw up Susie. I really don’t want everyone hounding him on it because then he won’t feel like it’s his decision anymore. I think he values my opinion the most and I know I can capitalize on this without taking any blood of my hands. I think he might end up doing Susie and Natalie which would be amazing because my conversation with Natalie was awful. If he also wanted to throw up Pete that would be really great too. Either way I’m excited to see how it goes down.
I’m not entirely sure how active I am gonna be tomorrow matter of fact lmfao but honestly I’m ready for the heat to pick up. We’ve all been sitting comfortably for a while and I’m ready for things to be shaken up.
I will actually try to shorten my relationship highlights today MAINLY because a lot of people I don’t have much to report on.
Natalie I have no comment on. I think I want her gone the most on a personal stand point. I won’t lie, her shutting me down when I asked her to tell me about herself has certainly made me a little bit bitter lmfao. But it’s like dude come on I’m trying to build a bond with you, even if you have no interest, shouldn’t your social game tell you that you should speak with me? Lmfao.
Spiral seems cool but him and I have still barely talked. We just keep scratching the surface of conversation but never go any deeper than that. If I won HOH I’m sure he would be all over talking to me lmao but oh well who knows where the future will go with him.
Sheila and I have been chill. I’ve been trying to put this seed in her head that she can really trust me and I would go out of my way to defend her. I think it’s working and I’m gonna keep working on that with her. I eventually want to get to the point where Sheila starts going to me as one of her first people when she finds out information. I also think knowing that she isn’t the couple makes me feel better.
Speaking of rumored couples, Jennie (the girl to be in the rumored couple) and I are doing good. I’m actually glad I asked her about her and spiral possibly being the couple because it made our relationship seem more honest. I always felt like there was a disconnect between us two so the fact that we got to have this humorous moment where she denied it and discussing them possibly being the couple made me feel a lot better about our bond.
On the note of rumored couples as well, let me talk about Adam; the guy I’ve been convinced is 1/2 of the couple all season. I want to first note that I really do think Adam is fully loyal to me and Amanda which is amazing. I don’t have any loyalty to him but if he does for me I’ll be sure to milk that for all I can. As far as his couple rumor is concerned, maybe I was off track with Sheila and Adam I’ll admit it but Adam and Susie have to be the couple in my mind. Adam telling me after the challenge that Susie was excited about me winning felt extremely weird. It felt like he was speaking for her which felt like a thing only a couple would do. I’m 99% sure they are the couple which is exactly why...
Susie needs to go home! I know a made a deal with her protecting her but if she came at me I’ll just tell her the truth that I’m not the HOH. Even if she did come at me she’s gonna be in the pre jury so I won’t be sulking over it. I really wish her and I could’ve made a bond but she’s by far the biggest threat in the game. Everyone loves her and I’ve been on that wave that she’s dangerous since the second we merged. I won’t say I’m the sole factor of her elimination if she were to get evicted tomorrow, but I do think I will have played a key role in it.
I’ve talked to Jen more and she seems like a super sweet girl but I’m not sure what to make of her yet. I have to get to talking to her more to formulate a whole opinion about her.
Chelsia and I didn’t speak once today lmao so that should tell you how much stake I have in my relationship with her. Chelsia could go home tomorrow and I honestly wouldn’t blink lmao.
Shahbaz is still Shahbaz so you know lmao. You can only take so much of what he says seriously because it seems like everything he’s said to one person, he’s completely contradicted to another.
In all honesty I can see him going a lot farther by just being carried. If we could have a quick double eviction and get him out of the game like that, that would be epic.
Parker and Pete I’ll talk about together. They are in the same boat for me I think they are the shadiest players in the whole house. They both pretend to be chill and really cool when everyone also knows they are just trying to save face. Since the first day I met both of them to now my opinions about both of them have dropped. If the season truly does turn into a Group A vs Group B situation I will whole heartedly blame them. I was fully open to abandon the Group A ship and leave half of them to fight for themselves and then only keep connections with Amanda/Richard/James/maybe Jennie. But i feel like group B has been so closed off and cold that it hasn’t given any of us a fair chance to play with them. I really don’t want this to turn into a group B vs group A thing but that’s basically what it’s turned into.
The person I really want to highlight is my girl Aisleyne. I had an amazing conversation with her today and it really revealed a lot. If Aisleyne is playing me she deserves big points because she fully convinced me. Everything about our chat seemed so open and honest, and more importantly, she gave me a lot of valuable insight about group B. I think that I’ll be able to continuously reel her in to working with me. I advocated about her to several people and she knows that so I’m hoping so we can really develop a solid bond that she eventually considers me a close ally. She’s the only saving “grace” (see what I did there) of Group B.
Then just to rapid fire off my allies. Sezer, I know in my last confessional I kinda shit on our relationship but this HOH was imperative to reel us back in. I think this made him gain a lot more trust in me and I think down the road in making important decisions he will look towards me. In one of my very first confessionals I said how I wanted to eventually win Sezer over to my side from James and I think I finally did it. James and I are good too nothing to report. It’s pretty much the same as usual we just report back to each other when something happens.
My two allies Amanda and Richard are the heart of my game. Not only do I really like working with them but I like who they are. They are both hilarious and I can tell they really trust me both. The thing that’s amazing about both of them too is that I think they both truly consider me their number one which is perfect and it makes me feel very protected. I hope that I can continue to make them both feel very comfortable with me. I hope I never have to face choosing between the two of them because I honestly don’t know who I’d pick. I know I’ve been high on Amanda the past few days but Richard has slowly snuck his way into my good graces and they both give the same role to me. Richards my boy and Amanda’s my girl. Either way it doesn’t matter I don’t have to choose between them so I won’t lmao
This confessional wasn’t too eventful but got to keep you guys in the know
Until tomorrow after the chaos…